Making Progress: Dilation, Effacement, and Me

SO MUCH to blather at you about that restless bun that's been in my oven for 38 weeks!

Let's get the technical mumbo jumbo out of the way because it's EXCITING but not EXCITING. Spencer is still pretty much the size of a mini-watermelon but he's stretched from a swiss chard to the length of a leek...from a vegetable I'm not familiar with to a vegetable I'm not a fan of. "Can't wait to sneak a peak at my lil leek" - Todd. Regardless, I'm guessing I've got a lengthy little man in there because he's wedged up under my ribs while simultaneously using my bladder as a pillow. He's ALL OVER in there that I think he may be part octopus.

As for the specifics of being 38 weeks along, there's really not much to tell. The clock is winding down. He's still secreting that gunk that prevents his lungs from sticking together when he begins to breathe, he's layering on the fat, and his brain is continuing to develop it's Ivy League potential. And that's about it in that department! He's just prepping for his big debut!

As for moi, I could be leaking breast milk, but I'm not. I could have swollen feet and ankles, but I don't. No stretch marks, no itchy abdomen, no dark black tummy line, no sign of the mucous plug (ew). I AM really bouncing from hyper active to totally drained. Trying to use my spurts of energy to get last minute projects done. Contractions put a damper on that though. Yeeouch! I shed a few tear droplets the other day (haven't had many emotions while preggo) because I was in pain and frustrated but Todd rubbed the bump and made me feel a little better. It's good to have a partner in all this.

So here's my 38 week mug shot and shot of my mug, for posterity.

So I had my weekly doctor's appointment yesterday (but almost DIDN'T due to my doc ducking out to deliver a baby) and was totally ready to hear that I had made zero progress as certain people are convinced that I'm going to be late. My BP was still good (which I'm jazzed about because I've been having some headaches) and his heart beat was 142. Again, he gave the nurse a hard time and insisted on wriggling while she was using the Doppler. My little troublemaker. My weight remained the same and when she measured my fundal height, she said I was a little under but that it was alright. If she's not nervous, I'm not.

Like I said, I was honestly ready to hear that my cervix was like a steel trap and we'd just have to wait until next week for any developments. Shockingly, this was not the case! During my exam, she discovered I was 2 cm (1 and a wiggle, but she's counting it) and I'm 50% effaced. ROCK! Effacement is really what you want. Yes, they sort of go hand-in-hand (10 cm and 100% = baby) but you can only dilate SO FAR without being effaced. They can make you dilate but they can't thin you out! So I'm in a really good place and the doc said it truly can be any day.

The nurse said I might not even make it to my appointment next Wednesday!

The Godmother: Excellent. I think your body is ready to get him on outta there. I want to poke at him. Nicely of course. Rest up and efface!

Like always, I need to make notes of my contractions and call when I have them every 5 minutes for an hour. I was also told that if I am leaking any fluid to call right away, contractions or not. For the first time, I was spotting a little. I was told this could happen after a vaginal exam this late in the game but it was still scary to see. It didn't last long and now I'm back to feeling like me. All anxious and excited. It truly COULD be any time now. EEK! So tonight, we get the car seat and my bag in the car and stock the freezer and cupboard. This could possibly be the LAST WEEKLY UPDATE (if I get my way)!!!

My fortune cookie seems to think so!

So Close: Our Son's Arrival Is Right Around The Corner

Do NOT Google "mucous plus" unless you really want to see it. Nightmarish.

Oh, by the way, you DON'T want to see it. Even if you ARE pregnant.

So today I am 37 weeks along and my man is either the size of swiss chard or a really round watermelon, depend on who you ask. I'm guessing the comparison to swiss chard has to do with his length and the watermelon with his overall size ("Monster melon"). Either way, he's as tasty as ever.

I'm definitely starting to loosen up, ligament-wise. I've got the waddle going on but I was told that it's cute. I'm not leaking any breast milk, my feet and ankles aren't swollen, I'm still painting my own toenails (they're Slate this week)...but I AM contracting at really odd intervals. Last night, they were 2 hours and 48 minutes, 3 hours 24 minutes, 1 hour and 26 minutes, and 18 minutes apart...followed by nothing because I fell asleep. The previous day, they were 1 hour 29 minutes, 5 minutes, 41 minutes, and 3 hours 11 minutes apart. So we're all over the map in the contraction department.

Oh! My man is awake! And he has the hiccups. He ALWAYS has the hiccups.

At this moment, he's shedding all that weird vernix and lanugo shtuff and swallowing amniotic fluid. My nephews recently inquired what a shot of amniotic fluid might taste like. That was enough to make me want to throw up in my mouth. Basically, he's good to go and could come out at any time but the longer he cooks, the better. The only thing still developing really is the lungs. They're maturing and something called "surfactant" is being secreted. I guess that keeps the lungs from sticking together when he begins to breathe. I find that fascinating.

I find the fact that the lungs COULD stick together horrific!

I have 8 work days left until maternity leave. I'd be lying if I said I'm not starting to get nervous. I am. Not about being a parent or being responsible for raising a human being. I've gotten over that. I'm nervous about the dogs. I'm nervous about the house not being as clean as I want it. I'm nervous about my maternity-leave replacement being properly trained. I'm nervous about money (although it is so nice to know a paycheck is coming every week while I'm off). I'm nervous about things going well during delivery. I'm nervous that he might not be healthy or there will be some other complication. And yeah, I'm nervous about the pain and my ability to remain tough.

I'm sure every mother has these worries but they're all hitting me like a ton of bricks and keeping me up at night...though my bladder and a baby that never seems to sleep help with that one. I'm taking everything day by day. Actually, I'm taking things hour by hour because I never know for certain how I'm going to feel. I'm doing the best I can. This much I know.

The Pain Game: Having My Aching Suspicions Confirmed

Only 2 doctor's appointments (or LESS) to go before our due date!

Time flies when you're having...contractions? I had my weekly appointment this morning with one of my doctor's colleagues since she's off this week. I've seen this doctor before so I was totally comfortable. Well, as comfortable as I COULD be in an office without the air conditioning on...preggo chicks need AC, buddy...and after a day of pretty intense pain.

I had to leave work before the day even began yesterday because I was doubled over more than I was upright. I felt like I had an industrial strength rubberband around my mid-section which had me all rolled up on myself. So, feeling like a wuss, I bailed. I crawled back into bed and there I stayed for the duration. I slept on and off, watched a little TV when I was too uncomfortable to snooze, and had some mac-n-cheese care of the husband. Yep. That was my day in it's entirity.

Today I hit the doctor for what I hope was my third to last visit. My blood pressure was 110/64 (I was told this was excellent and I'll take excellent any day). Spencer's fetal heart rate was 160, which is the quickest it's even been! The nurse said he is a very active baby...I've been hearing that a lot about my little Squiggy. When the doc came in, I told him about the pain I'd been having and he had me lay down to measure my fundal height (36 cm), and right then...YEEEEEOUCH!

Me: I'm having a pain right now.
Doc: You're having a contraction right now!

He told me he could feel my entire belly firm up and that I was having a contraction at that very moment. He began feeling around to see if Spencer's head was down (and pushing on me like that while I was contracting was NOT awesome) but I was "very firm". He brought in the ultrasound just to be sure my guy was in position, which he was. I wish he wouldn't turned the screen to let me see my man. I should've asked. Wuss.

The weird thing is that he didn't do an internal physical exam. I was told I'd be examined for dilation and effacement every week until I popped but not this time. So I have no idea where I stand in that department. You would think that since he was handling me at the very moment I had a contraction, he'd be interested in what was happening below the belt. He just told me to stay on patrol (I had another contraction 33 minutes later so I'm thinking this is still all pre-term garbage) because things were definitely a-brewing. I'm guessing we'll get some news at my appointment next Thursday, if Spencer doesn't shock us all before.

In other tales of interest...

1. I am NOT a Group B Strep carrier so no antibiotics during delivery.
2. Spencer scored a third generation Yorktown Lanes bowling shirt from the Cottrells!!
3. He also scored another home-made blanket, this one with spaceships & aliens.

I managed to cart the Spencer bump to the Roll-n-Bowl for a few hours on Saturday but he told me when he reached his limit. We went home and watched Gray's Anatomy in bed while Todd rubbed my head. Sunday, I'm attempting to cart him to the Renaissance Faire in Geneva with his daddy and Auntie Phee-Bizzle. That will most likely be the last hurrah (and huzzah!) before my agenda switched to Motherhood Mode. I'm excited for both events, motherhood AND mutton-n-mead. Well, no mead for me but you get the point!

See you Thursday when we hit 37 weeks or 21 days to go!

Coming Soon: Time Flies When You're Creating Life From Scratch

A MORNING CONVERSATION

Me: Your son is the size of a cashew melon. I’m not sure what that is. Probably something in that exotic melons of California bin at Giant Eagle.
Todd: We can put him there when he's born and see which one he looks like
Me: By then he’ll be one of those weird little watermelons. I'll miss getting my weekly fruit salad updates.
Todd: Crazy cashew
Me: Oops. It's a CRENSHAW melon.
Todd: Boy in the hood
Me: I don't know what that means.
Todd: Crenshaw Ave.
Me: Oh.
Todd: My little maniac melon

For your viewing pleasure, here is a CRENSHAW melon, the week 36 fruit.

And here is what I look like had I swallowed a Crenshaw melon.

So we've got 4 weeks or 28 days until we hit our due date, depending on how you want to slice it. I'll slice it whichever way sounds shorter. I guess, according to What To Expect, I'm considered full-term now so if Spencer were to appear, all would/should be well. I can officially go into labor at any time. My dad had the nerve to say I still had 4 to 6 weeks to go. No tacking on extra time, sir!!  We'll know more on Tuesday as the doc checks for dilation, effacement, and "cervical ripeness". Yeah, pregnancy is gross.

Spencer isn't gross though. He's rocking away in there, although it was a little less than usual yesterday. But when Todd got into bed, he gave the bump it's night time rub and Spencer started showing off for his daddy. Because I'm carrying a boy, I tend to eat more, or so "they" say. I can buy that. I've consumed more Lucky Charms during pregnancy than I did in my youth! And my eating is giving him energy to practice sucking, blinking, swallowing, pivoting...all the stuff he'll be doing when he enters this crazy bananas world.

His head at birth will be the same circumference as his hips, abs, and shoulders. Odd.

So there it is. The scoop, if you will. I can't WAIT for him to get here!!!

News Flash: A Lack-Of-News Flash

So I had my first weekly doctor's visit today and this is what we've learned:

-His heart beat was 150.

-My blood pressure is still really good.

-His head is down so he hasn't repositioned.

-My cervix is shut, but per my doc, it's still pretty early.

-The fundal height was 34cm which she considered OK.

-The Group B Strep results should be in tomorrow.

The next appointment is 1 week from today so we'll see if anything changes. But like she said, it's still pretty early. He won't even be considered full-term until the end of next week. But she also said anything can happen, it's unpredictable, so I'm still on contraction patrol.

When they're 5 minutes apart for 1 hour, I'll call in. She doesn't like to send broads to Labor and Delivery unless everything sounds promising because they'll just send you home if the timing isn't right. If it's during office hours, she'll check me out there first. If it's in the evening, I can call and then go to L&D or go to L&D and then call.

Either way, I'm leaving with a baby.

Winding Down: Entering The Final Month of Preggoness

Welcome to the last month of my pregnancy! Only 5 weeks to go!

It's so hard for me to believe that this whole countdown started with 280 days and a baby the size of a pin-point. Now there are only 35 days until I give birth to a boy the size of a cantaloupe (as of now...once he hits 40 weeks, it's watermelon city).

He's still all soft. Skull, bones, cartilage. That's all well and good for squeezing him out of my junk but it still scares the bejesus out of me. My little marshmallow man. So fragile. And growth is allegedly experiencing a slow down at this point in time. I already knew he hit his birth length but I guess he'll be packing on the pounds a bit slower to save energy for his big journey. Such a short distance to travel...yet such a huge deal!

An interesting fact: while most of his systems are mature, his digestive system won't be fully operational for 1 to 2 years due to him depending on the umbilical cord in utero. Fascinating. To me. His mother. The penguin.

Yep, even though I'm not carrying much weight, I've got the pregnant penguin walk going on because all the weight I DO have, it front and center. Yep, I'm waddling a little but it's entertaining. And important, or so I hear. The waddle means my connective tissue is loosening which is important for the big day.

On a very awesome note, I have to believe that Spencer is "dropping", which sometimes doesn't happen until labor begins, because I can BREATHE! I can take actual, deep breaths without feeling like I'm going to keel over. I'll never take breathing for granted again. Breathlessness (and I have asthma so I know something about it) is horrific.

On a less awesome note, I haven't been feeling so hot the past few days. Horrible headache, dizziness, blurry vision. And of course there's the cramping/contractions and one fussy pain that I can't shake. And during all this "off" feeling, Spencer has been THEE most active he's ever been. I love it, but it makes it a bit difficult to get any solid rest. I had to take the day off work yesterday but everyone understands. We're in the home stretch. If he were born today, he'd have a 99% chance of surviving. That's a percentage I can live with.

Not sure how long I can live with this skull crushing business. But this helped.

Doc appointment on Tuesday. More blathering then...unless I burst before.

Internally Boxed: Being Abused and Entertained From the Inside Out

OUCH!

My man...my tiny, precious, little man that depends on me for sustenance, protection, and love...is BOXING MY GUTS nine ways from Sunday! Last night was like nothing he and I have ever experienced during our time together. For about 12 hours straight (no exaggeration), he twisted and turned and stretched and kicked and punched and rumbled and karate-chopped his mama's insides! He wants OUT! He's done! And honestly, I'm done, too. My internals can't take much more of this beat down. Half a day of internal attacks is a long time. And believe me, I love my little ninja. But going from a steady stream of movement to a full-tilt boogie, roller-disco, demolition derby in my uterus is exhausting.

I didn't get any sleep last night due to the beat down so I'm struggling this morning. I love being pregnant. In fact, I was telling Todd how much I'll miss the bump when it's gone, to which he replied, "We'll make another one". But I'm ready for Spencer to come on out into the world. I can make it another 5 weeks...I'm tough enough...but it would be nice to just have him be here. I made him from scratch. I want him in my arms. And I want my ribs to remain intact!  Pals have begun placing their bets as to when he'll arrive.  The winner gets the bottom shelf liquor of their choice delivered by me, dressed as a saucy cartoon character.

And my maternity leave begins 1 month from today (or sooner if there's a jailbreak).

12 weeks of the Spence Monster and me. Not bad. Not bad at all.

Honeydew: Bigger and Better Than Ever.

Starting tomorrow, I can say, "Spencer will be born next month!" HOT DOG!

Today, I am 33 weeks along and my man is the size of a honeydew. When I informed Todd (he likes to be part of the fruit salad fun), he said, "Honeydon't come too early".

Spencer should've already be at his birth length last week, somewhere around 20 inches, but he's still packing on the pounds. This week, he should be somewhere around 5 pounds. This makes me feel good because 5 pounds sounds less scary than 4 pounds. Keep porking up, baby. In fact, the infamous "they" say he could STILL double in weight! I'm not too worried about a 10 pounds package because he was running small/average back at our ultrasound. And if he does trun out to be a monster, so be it! I'll be bananas about him no matter what!

Last night, I made my son't bed for the first time! It was amazing.

Aunt Sugar said that his room is going to inspire him to be an astronaut, she just knows it. I'm thinking he might be inspired to be an alien. I wish I could post all the rad pictures of the Spencer Dome but I really want to wait until it's finished, which should be soon. We're waiting on 2 paintings, a growth chart and the glider for the nursery to be stamped as D-O-N-E. It's still my favorite room in Castle Grayskull. I wish it was my room. Todd and I both wanted to sleep in the crib. Insane, I know.

As for me at week 33, there's not much to say. Still working, still nesting, still coasting. My man was a maniac last night which makes me happy (yet makes me think I'm going to have an energetic monster on my hands). I've been a little more tired thatn usual since my bladder is my boss at night, and I'm still having dull back pains...but it's all manageable. I think I'm still rocking this pregnancy! I'm still shocked that PREGNANCY is the thing I'm good at, ha ha! The last items I needed for my hospital bag arrived yesterday so I'm all packed and ready to go. It's just up to him to say WHEN!

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous...but it'll all be worth it in the end!

Getting Comfy: Trying To Clock Some Hours In Dream Land.

Last week, I had no idea what fruit/veggie/food stuff Spencer was the size of. But I've been informed by another preggo chick's blog that at 31 weeks, he was the size of 4 oranges. Are they small, are they large...I can't tell you. But allegedly, that's how big my little bruiser was.

This week, 32 weeks to be exact, he is the size of jicama, which is really coincidental. My pal John Jackson and I were just discussing jicama. Neither of us knew what it was so I did some research and learned it's kind of like a water chestnut or a radish...therefore, it is disgusting, and the furthest thing from Spencer. Regardless, this week he is about the size of one of these nasty...vegetables? It doesn't really seem to be bigger than 4 oranges though.

At 32 weeks, my boy is pretty much at his birth length which should at least be around 19 inches and he's weighing in at around 4.5 pounds which is awesome. I want him to be as big and healthy as he can be!  "They" say he can even double in size between now and birth...my mom DID predict a 9 pound bundle of joy! This week, his Immune System is all in place...unless he's like his mommy, then he's doomed. And amniotic fluid is at it's maximum now so they're less juice to cushion his ninja activities.

And in the land of ME, it's said that insomnia affects about 75% of moms during the third trimester but it's not really insomnia that's my problem. Even my Chronic Fatigue Syndrome hasn't been an issue...I've actually had MORE energy during my pregnancy, including now. I'm just uncomfortable and FUSSY! Then there are frequent bathroom trips and then trying to get back into a comfy spot when the Round Ligament Pains and (I think) contraction cramping hits at night. Once I find that comfy spot, I'm out like a light again. There's just a lot of hunting going on during the night. The pillow between the knees is helping.

An additional help to my night time troubles has been the adjustment in my work schedule. I cut my days down by an hour and half, which may not sound like much (but it's IS when I was clocking 10.5 hour days). But it's been 2 days and I can already feel the difference. By the time I start feeling irrationally fussy at work, it's time to hit the road. And I have some extra time while I'm there to relax, settle, and empty my mind in order to get some quality snoozing in. I feel really good about it...even if it makes me feel incredibly lazy. I'm going to embrace the laziness because in no time...it'll vanish!

Baby Shower is this weekend which is a milestone we need to hit! I'm in such a panic about him coming early and us being unprepared but things are looking MORE than good that I won't be dropping any bombs before Sunday. I'm keeping everything crossed that this is the case...especially my legs. To my girlfriends out there, I really can't WAIT to see your sexy faces! It's been far, far too long!

Time for morning meds and the countdown until my long weekend begins!



Shut Tight: Taking It Day By Day, Week By Week.

My brother-in-law just walked up to me and said, "So I heard your cervix is still closed". Yep, died a little on the inside just then. But he's the godfather so I guess he can comment...and at least he cares about what's going on in Spencer Land.

Skipping over Father's Day for now to talk about my doctor's appt while it's fresh.

Went to my follow-up appointment with my OB/GYN yesterday. As soon as I walked in the office, my nurse said, "Baby's giving you troubles, huh?" and was he ever, though I don't blame him. He's crammed into a small space and probably itching to see the world. Or at least to tell me to stop talking to him so he could some peace. Added a few pounds to my tally and gave a urine sample for good measure. Same ol' routine.

I spill my story to the nurse who thinks it's a little too early for me to be in pain. My doc arrives for an oh-so wonderful and quick pelvic exam. Typically, I don't mind them because they're over in a flash but there's no room for anything else in there at this point...it was a little more uncomfortable than usual. So as you already know, my cervix is still closed and that's good news. The longer he cooks, the better.

She did say, however, that because I've been having contractions (or so I'm told), I could be a totally different person today, so I just have to keep an eye on how I'm feeling day to day and go from there. She said besides the contractions, his size or position could be making things worse as far as my back pain (and that ever-annoying tailbone throb). But when she measured my fundal height, he's right on schedule! No more measuring ahead. Good news again.

So I'll go back in 2 weeks...then again in 2 weeks...and then every week, unless something comes up in between. She said to never hesitate to call and even if she's not available (for instance, I'll be seeing a different doctor at my next appointment), I can see anyone in the practice. She would rather over examine me than under examine, and I appreciate that.

I feel a little bit like I was rushed but there's nothing I can do about that now. She said she could tell I was winded and that my body is taking a little bit of a beating right now thanks to my main man.  But I breezed through the first two trimesters and the beginning of the third. She's hoping this is my little struggle and that labor and delivery will be a breeze. I'm going to try and believe that'll be true.

For now, I just have to deal with the discomfort and crampy pains and pay as much attention to myself as I can. I knew something was up this time around even if I didn't know I was having contractions (and by the way, these are NOT Braxton-Hicks...I'm having those, too, and I recognize them...but these trouble makers are the real deal). I have to believe that I'll know again if something is up.

Now to decide if I need to decrease my works hours...oh Pre-Term Labor!

Emergency Room: Proving It's Better To Be Safe Than Sorry.

In the words of Foreigner, "Urgent! Urgent! Emergency!"

Turns out that sometimes back pain during pregnancy is more than just back pain!

So after 3 days of constant lower back pain and some random, quick, stabbing uterine pains, I decided to head to the emergency room and have them see what's what. When it comes to Spencer, I'll happily deal with people calling me a wuss since back pain and tailbone pain come with the territory of pregnancy. Something felt OFF. I may have never been 31 weeks pregnant before but I know my body. We've had a lot of ups-n-downs together, and something wasn't clicking. Better to be safe than sorry and the people who really know and love me and Spencer backed up my decision to go.

One thing I learned is that hospitals don't mess around with pregnancy. Right there in the Emergency Room is a telephone that goes straight to the maternity ward if you are pregnant and ill/injured. It was like passing GO and collection 200 bucks! Maybe I should back track and say I spent several hours in the Urgicare on Wednesday night because my doc was in surgery and the back pain and lack of sleep were making me a little batty. Of course, as Urgicares are typically useless, they told me to rest and go to the ER if I felt any worse. Hence how I ended up on the maternity floor of the hospital (so I got to check out where Spencer will be born!!) and in a bed within mere minutes. Nice rooms, nice nurses, nice doctors...I felt like I was in backwards land.

So my awesome nurse hooks me up to a monitor and gives me a clicker to push every time Spencer moves while we wait for the house doc to show up. It's during this time that I'm told I have a "busy baby" because he was putting on quite the show, getting his groove on several times a minute almost the entire time I was chilling there. Thank technology for Smart Phones because I couldn't get a hold of my husband so I had to entertain myself. Lots of Facebook, lots of Solitaire, lots of texting, and lots of hitting that little clicker to mark that Spencer was well and rocking out!

Before the doctor even showed up, the nurse told me I was having small contractions. This was news to me! Is that the weird stabbing feeling I was...feeling? Were they just so mild that I couldn't tell? What does this mean for Spencer? It's TOO SOON! We don't even have the car seats yet! We only have one box of diapers! Needless to say, I was feeling a lot of anxiety and I was miffed that while he has a 7.5 month pregnant wife, my husband still doesn't keep his phone near him when he's sleeping. Grrrr. And booooo.

The doctor arrives and looks at the print out of my boy's heartbeat and contractions and it looks like they're every 12 minutes. After an exam...yep, the exact one you're thinking of...I'm told that my cervix is shut so I'm not in "clinical or active labor". That's a good thing because he is NOT done cooking. I need to keep him in there a while longer where he's safe. The test they did was to determine if I was at risk of going into clinical/active labor and the results would be back in 1-2 hours, so there I sat, trying to decrease my anxiety while waiting for my husband...who was finally on his way. I was an unhappy mommy.

My OB/GYN was paged and she said if they test results looked a certain way (what way, I'm not sure as I'm not a doctor), I could go home but she wanted to see me in her office ASAP. The test results DID come out in my favor and the contractions DID slow down a bit so I was sent home with information about pre-term labor (and a really fancy cup that measured my fluid intake), which I guess is my diagnosis.

I've been instructed to do a whole slew of things I've already been doing like:

- Drink 12 or more glasses of juice or water a day.

- Empty my bladder often.

- Lie on my left side to rest or sleep.

- Ask my doc how long I can be on my feet and lie down the rest of the time.

I also have to watch out for:

- A tightening in my belly every 15 minutes or sooner.

- Low, dull backache.

- Menstrual-like cramping.

- Pressure if the vag, as is the baby is pressing down.

- A change is discharge (YUM!).

- Flu-like aching all over the body.

What do you know...I have 4 out of 6. Do I win a prize?

Yep. I win a cat nurse who is watching over me, even as I type this very entry!!!

I also win a trip to see my OB/GYN on Monday to discuss what's gone on, see what's what, and make a plan. Hopefully that plan doesn't include bed rest because I'd feel better having a little bit more in the bank before I have to abandon ship. My plan was to work until my water broke on my office floor, ensuring that all of my maternity-leave weeks were spent with Spencer and not spent sitting on the couch, bored to tears (believe it or not, I sometimes get tired of TV...but don't tell my TV that).

So that's the Emergency Room drama that took place. Every day is an adventure, indeed!

Lucky Seven: The Clock Begins To Wind Down With 2 Months To Go.

Today I am officially 7 months (29 weeks) pregnant. The finish line is visible.

According to books/the interwebs/phone apps, Spencer is (or could/should be) close to 3 pounds and a little over 16 inches long. Muscles, lungs, head-n-brain are trucking along developmentally. The brain is even starting to get it's wrinkled maze shape. Luckily, I get more calcium then any one person should be allowed because he needs it right now, along with vitamin C and protein. What baby wants, baby gets. And baby is getting more fat so he doesn't look like a weathered old man when he's born (in approximately 11 weeeeeeks).

And fat = energy so Spencer is stronger and therefore...beating the bejesus out of me with more intensity and less randomness, lots of knees and elbows, or so they say. And "they" are right! He is moving far more than before and in a far different manner and he responds to EVERYTHING. I had some Skittles and the monster was all kinds of jacked up (even if Todd said if was his way of telling me he doesn't want to watch Project Runway). And speaking of Skittles, his permanent teeth are forming in his gums this week. So creepy. There weren't teeth and now...there are. Out of no where. Pregnancy is so insane.

As for me, the mom-to-be, I'm still dodging a lot of bullets. I haven't fallen into a 3rd trimester slump (though there are still plenty of weeks for that), my energy is up, my moodiness is low, my belly button remains in place, and I can see my feet...they don't look swollen at all! I AM, however, struggling in some areas. Still wrestling with constant back pain. It's not the end of the world but it's not at all awesome either. Realizing that my body can't physically do some things that I want it to...bend over, stand for long periods, etc. And I'm having trouble with heat, but heat and I never really meshed. The air conditioning is on and the pool is full so hopefully this discomfort can be altered.

But how do I alter a baby who MIGHT have an appendage of some sort up under my ribs? That is one theory of why I'm having a seriously bizarre and unwelcome pain on the left side of my "bump" that's not like anything I've ever felt before. Another theory is that it's one of those Braxton-Hicks practice contraction thing-a-ma-jigs. I don't know. I can't say for sure. I can just say that the days of being able to breathe normally are ka-put. But I'll take some skewed breathing and an annoying pain over some of the pregnancy horror stories I've heard. No doubt.

At least I was able to build his changing table before I became semi-useless!

So that's where we're at right now. 2 months/11 weeks to go and a lot on the agenda, including the baby shower. I can't wait to see my girlfriends and celebrate this dude that I am dying to meet! I'm not so much dying to go to my 1 hour glucose test tomorrow (checks for gestational diabetes and required me to drink a disgusting sugary solution within 5 minutes, followed by a blood draw an hour later). If we're in a text relationship, expect to get some because I will need to be entertained during this weirdness.

Did I mention that pregnancy is weird?

Swimming Along: Getting a Gold Star From a Medical Professional

28 weeks down and 12 to go. My little head of cauliflower is growing every day!

My man is about 16 inches and 2.5 pounds. And at this point, his brain is so developed that it is now regulating his body temperature. Look at the brain on my boy! He's Harvard-bound for sure! And speaking of his brain, he now enters REM sleep so he might be dreaming. I hope his dreams aren't as bananas as mine. Besides dreaming, he's also coughing, sucking, and breathing in there. And speaking of breathing, his lungs have matured enough that if he was born today, he's have an excellent chance of survival. But I'd like to keep him cooking a while longer.

As for me, some of the things THEY say might be happening to me aren't...his movements aren't bugging me at night, my belly button hasn't popped, I don't have any stretch marks, and my feet and ankles aren't swollen. But some of the things THEY say might be happening ARE...my lower back is pretty sore (though last night I discovered Todd really does make a better body pillow and I woke up pain free) and he is no doubt nestled on my sciatic nerve so my right thigh goes numb. It's a bizarre sensation but if that's the worst that happens in the third trimester, I'll take it! Sure, I'm only a week in but I still feel pretty grrrrrreat!Pregnancy and I really mix. Who wudda thunk it?? Better odds for a second bun.

Yesterday I had an appointment  (and a CHILD in braces from the trade school did my BP and found the heartbeat...it was bizarre) and my doc gave me a big thumbs up all around! My blood pressure is pretty much the same as it was pre-pregnancy, Spencer's heartbeat was a nice 154 beats, I'm only measuring 1 week ahead (instead of 2) which she says is more than fine by her (so he's probably not breech), and my weight gain has been nice and steady. And since things are really "swimming along", she said I can come back in 4 weeks instead of 2! We'll start the every-two-weeks appointments in July.

We discussed whether or not I might want an epidural (DUH!), if Spencer will be circumcised (DUH!), and if we want to do cord-blood banking (which we decided today we will be doing). We also quickly went over what to do when I go into labor: I should wait to call until my contractions are 5 minutes apart for 1 hour. I should also call if I have any weird bleeding (for example, there might be some after an exam but there shouldn't be any 4 days after an exam). And if his movements slow down...of course they'll slow down as he runs out of room...I should do "kick counts" - eat and drink and then lay down and make sure he kicks at least 10 times in an hour. If he doesn't, repeat. If he STILL doesn't, come in for Fetal Non-Stress Test.

Applying mind-over-matter. I have to believe the next 12 weeks will continue to be hitch-free.

Stress Levels: A Note To The Unborn Vol. 6

Dear Spencer Monster:

You just let me know that you're awake (a little earlier than usual) by punching me square in the rib. I probably deserve that. I've been really stressed out recently and I know that's probably stressing you out. You don't need any extra stress. Being stuck in that small space while you're trying to grow is enough without taking on any of my garbage. I'm trying to de-stress and deflate, honest.

I'm just physically uncomfortable, which is not AT ALL your fault. It's just the nature of growing a human being in your guts. My back was already in bad shape and I had a few hits against me, like Chronic Fatigue Syndrome on top of sleeping issues. But I'm doing my very best to suck it up and power through.

I guess the emotional stuff is adding to the stress. I'm just so worried about being a good mom to you. You're the MOST important thing I've done in my life and I don't want to be responsible for screwing you up. And I'm worried about you while you're in there, cooking away. About now, you're able to feel pain, and that makes me feel HORRIBLE! I don't want you to feel any pain, EVER. While you're my internal tenant, I should be able to protect you the BEST! Ugh. Am I failing you already??

I shouldn't be venting to you. You're awesome, even when you do punch me in 8 different locations at once. How DO you DO it? Your cousin Matt (who decided he needs to be your Uncle Matt to have more influence in your life) just said it's time for me to pop you out already. Everyone is pumped for your arrival. You are totally loved by all...but no one loves you more than your mommy. Period. And if anyone tried to tell me differently, I'll find a way to punch them in the back of the belly button. I learned that move from someone cool.

Anyway, I just want you to know that I'm doing to best I can out here to do the best for you. I'm kind of learning as I go. Books and websites and other mothers can tell you a lot of things...and I appreciate all those things...but whatever happens for us is what's going to happen. I have a doctor's appointment on Thursday and I'm hoping the doc says you and I are doing A-OK!

Feel like having a banana? I'm thinking that you do.

LOVE YOU, MONSTER!

xoxo
Mommy

Third Trimester: The Final Leg Of This Crazy Race.

 Official business: android or monster for the Spencer Dome? Both, right?

This is my 50th post at 1313 Mockingbird Lane, my 27th week of pregnancy, and the official kick-off of the 3rd trimester! It's hard to believe that I am 2/3 of the way done cooking this little turkey that I am insanely in love with and madly over-the-moon about. Even if he did just punch me in the back of the belly button. That's his new skill, hitting the target.

Friday afternoon, my guy was ROCKING OUT. Keep your eyes to the left:

Cuteness To Remember
On Friday night, Todd was giving my belly a good rub when Spencer gave him a swift kick (or punch). So Todd nudged back...and Spencer nudged back. It was like they were fist pounding or something. Todd was so funny and excited and wanted me to feel the hand...or foot...or elbow...whatever...but I let it be their little moment. I have all kinds of one-on-one bonding time with him, it's got to be a little harder for the dads. With Todd's work schedule, I'm worried that Spencer's newly-hearing ears with mistake Detective Elliot Stabler as his father. HA!

On Saturday, we went to a wedding and I was told that I'm cute pregnant : )

Moving on. At 27 weeks down and (lucky) 13 to go, Spencer is STILL the size of a tasty eggplant. I'm guessing they're tasty, even though I've never had one. Everything revolving this little dude is delicious, so says his mother. He's no longer measured crown-to-rump. At our appointment next week, it'll be all head-to-toe! And in that big head, is a big and developing brain. Eyes are opening, ears are hearing, mouth may be jammed full of fingers, and taste buds are tasting. Last night we had some ice-cream and he had a strong reaction to it! Let's hope those were squirms of approval!

The shower invitations are on their way and THEY HAVE ROBOTS ON THEM.

And what else is awesome? The crib came AND Todd surprised me with a picture this morning of it all assembled and waiting for it's tenant. The changing table gets put together tomorrow. Sure, it's a table that will eventually be filled with baby bodily fluids, but I love all things Spencer-related so...I'm psyched! *It's black though it appears brown*

And I'm psyched that a lot is going on in the next 13 weeks that will hopefully make time fly. Take a sneak peek at my ever-growing (no, not belly - I'm still on the small side as websites and books say I should have gained around 16-20 lbs by now, but I'm still hovering around 10) calendar of events:

REMAINDER OF MAY
- next doc appointment
- Memorial Day

JUNE
- 2 doctor's appointments
- a family wedding and New Bomb Turks
- several birthday celebrations
- Father's Day cookout
- Lady Lead Foot's official debut show
- registering for delivery (still sounds so insane)
- Baby Shower

JULY
- 2 doctor's appointments
- 4th of July fun
- kids pool party
- packing the hospital bag
- Los Straitjackets (maybe my water will break there!!!)

AUGUST
- weekly doctor's appointments
- DOING THE SPLITS ON A CRATE OF DYNAMITE!

Yeah...it'll be here in NO TIME! I'm going to rule you, 3rd trimester!!!

Snack Size: Experiencing Weird Symptoms In Small Doses.

And now for your viewing pleasure, 26 weeks...still an eggplant.

Nice flowery drawers, grandma. What can I say? They're comfy and comfy is what I need since Spencer seems to be pushing buttons for weird symptoms these days.

ON THE MENU

 A. My back has always been a problem (since I partially slipped a disc years ago and followed that up with a compression fraction from falling down the stairs). Add a one pound eggplant to that pressure and, well, nights have been unpleasant.

B. I can no longer regulate my body temperature. HOT is my only setting.


C. I'm guessing Spence Baby is positioned on a nerve because for a few days, my right thigh was asleep. Now it's my right thigh, forearm, and there's a dull and annoying tingle on the right side of my torso. Not painful but highly annoying.


D. A very mild heartburn seems to be present in the morning. But we were told at week 18 that the baby already had hair and rumor is babies with lots of hair cause heartburn. Tums are on my "CAN HAS" list. I'll deal.


E. Bloody noses have returned but they aren't super-soakers like before.


F. Round Ligament Pains have returned but like in the beginning, it's when I make a quick movement, when I sneeze, when I'm positioned one way for too long. They're no big deal but of course I totally FREAK because I feel like I'm ripping my guts to shreds and somehow hurting him. He gets a nice massage after I feel one of those twinges.


G. I keep having incredibly vivid dreams and they BUG ME!


H. I'm back to getting up at least once, if not twice, to empty my tank during the night. Like with the back problems, I've always had sleeping problems. So these little night time annoyances are...annoying.


I. Leg cramps a.k.a. CHARLIE HORSES! Pre-pregnancy, I told NOT handle nor tolerate Charlie Horses and they made me into a HUGE baby. I would crumble to the ground. Somehow, during my preggoness, I’ve figured out how to stop them as soon as they appear. Small victory.


* Side note: how unfair is it that clumsiness is a side effect of pregnancy??? I’ve been burdened with being a walking disaster my entire life. Does it really have to intensify while I’m responsible for protecting a little person??? Grrrrrrr.


At least I can poop. That's a small yet powerful blessing! And sure, there are a lot of things on my list but I'm not bitching (YOU'RE NOT??), just making note. All of these things affect me in small ways. They come and they're gone. I just want to have a list of things to use during guilt-trips when he's older.


Enough about me. Let's blather about him.


26 WEEKS: The nerves is his ears are way more developed so he can hear both me and Todd, which is good because I'm been chatting to him nightly and I don't want him to miss out on any of my gems. He's still practicing breathing in the amniotic fluid and he's piling on the fat so he's more pinchable and less...Skeletor. Allegedly he's more than a pound (maybe even close to 2) and over a foot long. And his testicles are making their descent. That's my little man!


As for me...I'm still supposed to be sleeping and eating, which I am, but watching "Pregnant In Heels"  (Rosie Pope is my new female celeb-crush) has me anxious to sign up for the free childbirth related classes offered by our hospital. The better prepared you are, the easier it'll be. They're free so WHY NOT? I know blood pressure can become an issue at this time which freaks me out because I've had blood pressure issues, on the low end. Hopefully that was a fluke.


And there you have it. The world according to me and Spencer!

Just Like Heaven: How I Fell in Love With a $50 Pillow.

15 weeks to go. 105 days until my due date. BOOYAH!

As of today, I have been pregnant for 6 months and am coming into my last few weeks of the 2nd (and fan-effing-tastic) trimester. Spence Baby is a little over a pound and a half, somewhere between 9 inches and a foot tall, and awesome as ever. Nothing much has changed about me in the last week besides the return of mild heartburn, some dull back pain and restless nights. Still no signs of stretchmarks, belly button is where it belongs, and I'm not rocking that creepy black line or belly hair. Thank God for small (and let's admit it, VAIN) favors...like my thick, shiny hair!

I have heard that I'm starting to walk like a pregnant person...but a pregnant person that walks really fast. I don't know why I feel the need to push it...my heart and lungs are working 50% harder because of my increased blood volume so I should probably chillax. I guess I just want to be super awesome until I can't be super awesome anymore!

You know what else is awesome. MY BODY PILLOW! I've been bugging Todd for one for over a month and he finally broke down this week and hooked me up (he didn't want to be replaced by a pillow), along with a belly band, which I assume will be needed soon. I sometimes get tangled up in the pillow which can be terrifying but overall, it's helped my neck, my back, and my little guy be more comfortable during the night...and even during evening TV watching. My work chair doesn't exactly offer maximum comfort, so yeah, body pillow = awesome.

And this little outfit from Aunt Phoebe is awesome, too.

I said he'll be my little jailbird and Todd said, "CONVICT!". Of course, we love it. It's sized out to be perfect for colder weather (I picture it with a denim jacket) and has a little pocket on the butt...which is for his wallet according to Phoebe, and his flask according to me. She's sticking with a black-n-gray motif since that's all she wears and she doesn't want them to clash when they hang out together. Smart thinking, Aunt Phoebe.

I painted the nursery last weekend but haven't snapped a pic. Drat.

Let's add a big DRAT to the fact that we picked out a crib (not an easy feat), paid for it, and then got an e-mail saying it's out of stock. WTF! Sleeping in a dresser drawer like baby Carrie from Little House On the Prairie is becoming more of a reality for us. It really transformed smile to frown. I want his crib, dammit! I want that space to transform from hodge-podge guest room to the SPENCER DOME! I guess we'll just have to go back to the drawing board and pick something else. Blast.

And by the way, in the development department, his skin is pinking up due to forming capillaries, his lungs are in practice-mode, and his formerly-closed nostrils are opening up. He's still practicing his grasping and holding and has been toying with his sense of touch...touching anything he can get his hands and feet on! He's piling on some baby fat and moving right along. I can't wait to see the cute face I keep dreaming about.

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there. So psyched to finally be one of you!



Speed Bump: The First Low After 24 Weeks of Highs.

Spencer is 24 weeks along and allegedly the size of an ear of corn, according to one website. Another still compares him to a papaya until he hits the 6 month mark next week. I really can't believe I've been pregnant for 6 months. The finish line seems closer and closer, which is fantastic. I had a dream about Spencer being in his crib last night and I'm just dying to see that vision in person!

Here's a vision for you...

 

Not too much of a change in my bod from 22 weeks, at least not from the outside (though the interwebs say my innie should be an outtie but it's tucked in where it should be). Inside, his facial features are filling in and he's getting some baby fat so he looks less like a beakless chicken. Still just gaining and growing. I'm growing, too, as I was up 4 more pounds at my appointment today. That puts the grand total to 10 pounds gained but due to some digestive issues I've been having, I'm guessing that number is going to drop. In fact, speaking of "drop", we've hit a little bump in the road...but I'll get to that momentarily.

For now, he's growing, he's squirming, and showing off. In fact, Todd shot a video of him showing off his moves while we were in NYC. It may be hard to see his ninja kicks-n-punches from this cell phone vid, but you can hear the happiness in our (and Aunt Sharon's) voices, which is equally as awesome!

And even though I posted this snapshot over at my day-to-day blog, it truly belongs here. Father and son in NYC. I was relaxing before we hit the town again and Todd came over to give my bump a sweet and comforting rub. Spencer knows when it's daddy's big, hot mitts on him and shows off. It's my favorite photo in the world officially.

Speaking of our NYC adventure, we had an amazing "Babymoon". I fell in love with Spencer's daddy all over again. We know each other so well that every time I had a sore muscle or achy back or just needed a little physical attention, he knew and gave me what I needed. I have to give myself a pat on the back (and the belly) for hoofing it miles and miles and miles every day and making the most of the time I had with my friends and that amazing city. It was fantastic and I can't wait to put Spencer in his I <3 NY onesie!

Now for something that's NEVER fun!

As I blathered earlier, I had an appointment today but it was an emergency stop off (our next appointment WAS scheduled for Monday). After 24 weeks of what I can only describe as a BAD ASS pregnancy, I had a little hiccup. I don't want to go into the details because they're uber-personal, but Tuesday and Wednesday were HORRIFIC days and took almost everything I had out of me. Hence the emergency trip to the doc.

I had to get an exam and was happy to hear that I have no bleeding and my cervix is shut tight. And my doc gave me some instructions on what to do to right the wrongs that my body has been going through. I'm to stay off my feet for a few days and then I can get back to business as usual!

But there was a tiny little concern about my fundal height (a.k.a. the measurement from the pubic bone to the top of the uterus which should be a centimeter for every week you are along). I'm measuring 2 weeks early, which my doctor wants to keep an eye on. It could just be because (oh the glamor of pregnancy) I'm "backed up", but it COULD be something more:

-Multiples (already ruled out)

-Error in conception date (since we were trying, we're confident in out date)

-Healthy but large fetus

-Gestational Diabetes

-Excess amniotic fluid

-Breech baby

I'll have a blood test in the next 2 weeks to test my sugar and hopefully rule out the Diabetes. And I'm just going to cross everything I have that if he IS breech, he takes his remaining time in utero to turn around. For now, there's no reason to worry. His heartbeat was perfect and he's busting moves like a maniac. We'll just see how my bump is measuring at the end of May. Then the appointments move to every two weeks...every milestone brings him closer to my lovin' arms!

And like me, he loves Lady Gaga's new song. Grooves whenever I jam "Judas".

That's my boy!